There is fun to be extracted from the mis-heard, mangled messages that the brain compiles.
It is perhaps a reversion to an earlier stage of one’s life.
It has echoes of the litany that a child mindlessly repeats using words that are meaningful, although contextually incorrect.
Consider a catholic child praying: ”Hairy Mary, fell off grass”

I have discovered that these errors may be named Mondegreens or Oronyms.
A mondegreen is a mishearing or misinterpretation of a phrase as a result of near-homophony,
in a way that gives it a new meaning, the Oronym is typified by the “Four Candles”/”Fork Handles” sketch.
Spot the difference.

I haven’t given all the translations. Work them out. I had to.

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• Said derisively of a politician; “He is Flip-Flopping on His Shoes”.


• Quoted as an example of the innovative ideas needed to get the economy moving again;
  “A Self Eating Baby’s Bottle”.


• On the novel technology being installed for airport security; “Rectal Scanners”.


• "Four Kestrel Manoeuvres in the Park”.


• When asked how she felt after winning the Eurovision Song Contest the Danish contestant replied,
  “I’m the heaviest girl in the world”.


• A motorcyclist explaining the problem he experienced during a race;
  “I found my thighs’re misting up”.


• Stroke victims are being treated with an experimental new therapy that uses stem cells grown from faecal material.


• ”… and after the news we’ll be talking to an angry penis”. Turned out to be an irate musician.


• “Elephants and winos at risk….”


• Alex Salmond, at the Scottish Nationalist Party conference (April 2014):
  “The yes campaign is positive, uplifting, hopeful and must always stay that way…
  This is our moment. To be a pig in a poke. Our country, our Scotland and our independence.”
  This one I did have to check for a correction. It apparently should have been heard as, “a Beacon of Hope”. Not “a pig in a poke”.


• A reader, by the unlikely name of Ivor Supermarket, reports hearing of a "Tesco World Heritage Site" on the radio.
  The United Nations obviously need a catchy phrase. Every Little Helps.

Please submit your own experiences of mis-heard overhearings(?).

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There is a variation on this topic. Just as incorrect hearing can lead to odd interpretation, so too can incorrect viewing. This whole field, both auditory and visual, could potentially lead to a replacement for the venerable Rorschach Ink Blot Test. Consider the Freudian implications of the following examples:-

Out on a ramble I spotted a mobile cleaning service van with the catchy business title "Busty Dusters". I excitedly pointed this out to my fellow walker. He calmly pointed out that the title was the more prosaic "Busy Dusters". Palpable disappointment all round.
On a bus recently I was idly scanning an advertisment for fast food. The poster included a small round logo with the words "Mini First Dump" printed round some indecipherable shape. This seemed a strange logo. My brain suggested a closer inspection. A second reading produced "Mini Fist Pump". I am still no wiser, but more accurately informed.